Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Spring Fever

It was 82 degrees here yesterday. It was barely above freezing Saturday.


Welcome to Texas.


I love spring. I love fall. I hate heat over 90 and cold under 50. And since I can't live in San Diego, I will always be gripey because of the weather.


The spring brings:
Spring cleaning
Shaving my thighs
Pedicures
Planting flowers
Going in search of the total body swimsuit that has yet to be invented.
Vats of sunblocks
Vats of bug spray
Vats of wine

And my sick patients suddenly become well. They have the same spring fever the rest of us have and want to have less visits, which means, well, you know...less money. Hello, sick patients....Do you have any idea how expensive vats of wine are?!

Speaking of patients:
Nurse arrives to check on patient with Diabetes. This patient has to have insulin and we provided him with a sharps container to dispose his used syringes in. When done adminstering the insulin, the nurse turns to find the sharps container was full.

Of COOKIES.

THAT my friends, is being green to the bone.

YEA!!! He needs more education, which means more visits!!!!!!

Liquor store, here I come. I wonder if they sell razors there? My thigh hairs could be braided.

48 comments:

Eudae-Mamia said...

Ugh - thigh hair. Take it from me, don't forget to shave the backs of them.

Yeah - not so pretty.

Happy Spring my dear!!

Wheezer said...

Getting waxed for the first time this season next week. Woohoo! Smoothiness here I come!

Tiffany said...

Hey haven't YOU hid cookies in weird places? Don't lie.

And I'll have to get my hubby's beard trimmer to whack through the outer layer of fur on my legs. THEN I can shave them.

Kristen Hermanny said...

My thigh hair is soooo baby fine that I have to shave knee to butt, butt to knee, left to right, right to left, diagonal...Then they still have little fuzzies all over. I wear capris all summer. That and the fact that I am super white and don't tan. I burn, peel, then am totally white again.
If all my freckles would connect I would be all set.
I love pedicures, I get them all year long.

Mrs Parks said...

I have never not once shaved my knees or above :)

Ginger said...

You sound like me with the weather. My perfect temp is around 80. I was in town yesterday and there is still snow on the ground.
Do you work in a hospital or home health?
I hate shaving my legs, I always cut myself around my ankle bones. Ouch!!

Nicole said...

It was 72 here and I'm lovin it. Bring on summer!

amelia bedelia said...

Yes please shave or I'm not coming and swimming this summer. Please oh please tell the waxing story again. I think I told it one time. That would be a good repost.

Halftime Lessons said...

LMAO

I had endless diabetic wit to share, but now all I have is a head full of thigh hair.

Is it soft, at least?

Aria said...

Texas has 'Weather by Sibyl'... yes, I have to remove the braid-beads from my legs too...
and you have an award waiting for you over at my place... Great day to you Jill!

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

It is in the 70's 80's here and I have not shaved in a few weeks! It is terrible, I hate shaving!

Maybe you should start marketing the SHARP containers to go with Girl Scout Cookies! Bedazzle one and you could get big bucks!

Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

Really braided thigh hair? LMAO. Really? Go now, go now and shave the forest.

Mrs Cooper said...

And here I thought I was the only one that wasn't a full leg shaver in the winter time.

Soxy Deb said...

They don't sell razors there, but they may loan you a box cutter.

mommy nurse said...

Hair, ugggh! I just shaved up here in MI! The braid came out and the razor(s) pulled out! Along with a plungger for the clogged up drain! I love spring.

Jane! said...

Might be easier just to move to Europe than shave.

dana said...

I just noticed my thighs today. Hair isn't the issue; it's the sudden appearance that I am wearing an accordion on the inside of each thigh!

Music anyone? I wonder if I rub them together we'll hear polka music.

Desiree said...

I don't shave above my knees and the hair has almost worn completely off. I am looking forward to flip flops! I think 74 is the perfect weather. Now if I could figure out how to have it and gorgeous mountains I'd be set!

Lori said...

I never shave my thighs in the winter. So glad to know I'm not the only one.

We've had spring-like weather here in MI, too (60s and 70s) but they are calling for snow on Thursday. Kill me now.

Justine/Justiney/Tiney said...

YOu're kidding me, right? How did he get the cookies? Or are these home visits? Geez Louise!!!!!!

Shaving your thighs huh? If I shaved my CALVES three times this whole winter that'd be stretching it.

Justine :o )

Debbie said...

Which aisle are those vats of wine on? I could really use a few.

Ronda's Rants said...

We have vats of wine and beer left over from Engagement Party...we let daughter advise on how much to buy...she must have confused it with a frat party!!
I have a pedi and a mani scheduled for tomorrow...I am so excited you think I was going to get a new car!
Happy Spring!!!

Jenni Jiggety said...

Thigh hair is such a pain...

I want to have all my hair from the chin down lasered off.

Swirl Girl said...

I'd check his bedpan for the sharps...ya know - cuz he tossed the cookies, could he have eaten the sharps??

Dawn said...

I'm loving the weather this week. I haven't gotten to really enjoy it though with Camryn being sick.
I'm looking forward to getting out tomorrow. However, out of nowhere it has started raining! LOL! Ack!

Send wine my way! LOL!

Lisa L said...

You just never, ever know what you are going to walk in on when you enter someone's home do you? As in, from a nurse's perspective. Cookies in the sharps container? Now I've not seen that before. I've seen alot of sh*t, but that one? huh...I wonder if he put them there to 'hide' them or because he thought they'd stay fresh? I've seen rats the size of cats, just hanging out in the living room (I kid you not),hoarders,(is that how you spell it? people who can't get rid of everything, and you walk through tiny pathways of crap to get to the patient,) wierd bizarro (and sometimes scary)relatives , foaming at the mouth dogs who would just love to sink their teeth into you....but the cookie thing? never...

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Be nice to him, he may have a stash of money lying around too. If he thought that he could get by with hiding his cookies, just think what else he's hiding and where????

It was 93 here today so I feel your pain!!

Carissa(GoodnCrazy) said...

Okay my cookies.. sometimes are totally sharp.

I wish I had a sharps container in my kitchen in fact for all my sharp cookies...

Sharp Sharp Sharp. Course I'm married to a diabetic so I could use a real sharps container anyway.. :)

Anonymous said...

omg, you friends postings were just as funny as yours!!! You totally crack me up!

Shaving? full leg? have to do it all year long!! there is no skipping the thigh AT ALL!! But I can make it through the winter shaving every other day, but once summer comes, it is EVERY FREAKIN' DAY!! So I am so used to shaving and would rather have smooth than scratchy that I dont mind shaving. Am I the only odd one? I guess so, LOL!!

It finally got warm here also, snow finally melted and things are blooming. We hit 63 yesterday so it was really nice. Glad I dont live in Texas, I have to say. I HAT THE HEAT, so I wouldnt survive very well down there.

Anyway, have a great day and thanks for your great sense of humor!!

A new fan,
Jill from NY

The Nice One said...

There is nothing crazier than Texas weather.

Oh wow...cookies in the sharps container...thats a new one...

Michele said...

You are too funny! Cookies!!!

I want spring here...this up and down weather in Wisconsin just sucks!

Hugs...it's almost the weekend!
Michele

Janie at Sounding Forth said...

Screw shaving.

Braid that shit.

nikkicrumpet said...

PICTURES......WE NEED PICTURES of the thigh hair!!! I'm running out of gross stuff for my "I wish Wednesday" posts....or hey I have an idea.....YOU + blond wig + bathing suit + not shaved thighs. Woo hoo that's bound to bring in the commenters!!!!!

Midwest Mommy said...

I know what you mean. It was 75 on Tuesday here and 40 on Wednesday/Thursday.

Bee and Rose said...

I have a very non-compliant diabetic husband and I have busted out his secret stashes many times! What the heck is wrong with some of these diabetics?!

Not even a triple bypass got my hubs attention!

Rhonda said...

You shave your thighs??? Are you crazy?

Wait.

You show enough leg to require shaving??? Good on ya!

Julie said...

Pedicures. Yes. I can't wait.

Can I come live with you in the winters?

Deb said...

I'm thinking of corn rowing my entire leg. It might just be easier that way.

Fragrant Liar said...

Oh, you are so right about the thigh shaving, but it's not just that. It's the whole leg and pit shaving thing. As long as it's winter and I'm covered up, I shave every couple weeks. There are some real advantages to not being in a relationship.

Deb said...

do they make valium in IV form? if so, you can come up here and i will be your patient! i'll even cover your travel expenses (although after april 15, my pockets will be empty).

man, things have hit an all time low over here. so interesting that when kids are involved, it can happen so very quickly. one day, everything is fine, the next, the school counselor is on the horn. nice.

hope things are looking up for you.

Michelle said...

I shave everyday! Hope you have a great week. The weather here has been nice.

Beth said...

The weather has been rather screwy in Georgia, too. And already, I've been killing misquitoes. Argh!

The price we pay to live where the snow doesn't fall...

nonnasnonsense said...

around here spring means shaving my legs. period. and screw the thighs! lol hey if hubby doesn't care who am i to bother? i agree with you on the temps. i was freezing this winter for some reason. can't believe the cookies in the sharps box. crazy!

NucMEd is Hot said...

I say when you have your own pool, thigh shaving can go out the window.

Who doesn't use the sharps box for cookies, I mean really girl, do you have to be a tyrant???

binks said...

Granny always told me that shaving above the knee caused cancer. Not sure what kind of cancer, but you're a nurse, you should know.

Elaine A. said...

Oh crap, guess I need to shave my thighs too. Dammit.

Kritta22 said...

Spring clean!!???????

Gross.

h2ofossil said...

Now there is the jill pill that I know and love!