Friday, January 9, 2009

"R" You Ready For This?

Today, because I have had only three hours of sleep, I am doing this little diddy. It's a fun thing that makes you list ten of your favorite things that begin with the letter the blogger gives you.

I received my letter from Deb and I thought YIPEEEE! She bestowed upon me the letter "R".

Just as on Wheel of Fortune "R' is a staple. "R" will be easy breezey slice of cheesey. "R". Ummm. Uhhhh.
Oh, okay, okay, I know.

Rice. I love rice. Long grain, brown, Boil-in-a-bag, instant, fried, steamed. You name it. But my above all favorite is what my family calls sweet rice. For breakfast nothing is better than a warm bowl of rice with milk, sugar, and butter. I can eat the whole box. I stand over my kids secretly hoping they leave me enough.

Relations. Yes. I mean S-E-X. Mom, you can skip this part if you are feeling flushed. Call me weird, but I love it. Now. I don't mean this second, but now in my life. With my husband. With someone who loves me and tells me I am beautiful, even when I don't feel like I am. Always better with Romance. Hee! I combined two.

Roombah. No, I don't have one, but my SIL does. She swears by it, so I want one. I HATE sweeping, and sweeping, and then sweeping again, all in 42 minutes. The dead grass and dried mud drive me absolutely batty. Plus, I think it might be funny to watch my dog, Andy, with the flattened little R2D2 thing sucking all the gunk up off the floor without anyone manning it. It's so Jetson-like. I will learn to love it.

Renovations. On someone else's home, of course. I have lived in re-do's since I was first married at 19. I love to paint. It is very therapeutic for me. I love to fix things and make them all pretty. Then, six months later, I do it again.


Rock. Not the ones you step on and hop around with weirdly contortioned feet, but the music kind. Now that I am "old" I find myself listening to Pop Rock, but the urge to slam in some Hard Rock is always there. Is it just me, but when you hear certain songs from "back in the day", does it make you want to drive fast with the windows down and your hair blowing with that sense of "coolness" that suddenly washes all over you? No?! Hmmm.

Reclining. No, not recliners, but just reclining. It's more involved than just sitting. I also have my spot on the couch that I call mine. With a simple flick of my hand I can make anyone in the house move out of my spot. It is a known gesture. No arguments or whining. I have claimed it. I blog there. I watch TV there. I drink my Diet Cokes there. It is a sacred place. Hello. My name is Jill and I am lazy.

Reading. I love to read and wish I had more time to sit down with a good book and read my brains out.

Okay, eight down and 2 to go. I am hitting a wall here. "R" isn't as easy as I thought. Let's break it down. (na nana na)

R-A: Raggedy Ann? Raman noodles? Racing? No. None of these, though Raggedy Ann is cute and I DO have one from my childhood. But I look too much like her. Except for the triangle mouth. And I DID eat Raman noodles during my divorce and lost 30 pounds. And racing might work if I was any sort of athletic. Does racing to the bathroom to keep from peeing yet another pair of panties count? I didn't think so.

R-E: Renuzit? Regurgitate? Rebound? No, none of these do anything for me. Reeses? Now that I could handle. I will take 5 please. But even that isn't in my "love" category.

R-I: Ricola? The song alone makes me want to NEVER try the product. Rhino? (Shut it, the "H" is silent) Ricotta? I do love Ricotta....

R-O: Rotel? Mmmm, love it. Rolaids. Very important AFTER Rotel. Row Row Row your boat? Oh dear Lord I have lost it.

R-U: Rubiks Cube? Nope. Rudeness? Hate it. Rum? NOW we are talking!! Coconut please.

Okay my favorite R:

Rick. I know I have gushed about him and made you ill, so I will tell you what made me laugh the other day. He received a business card from a woman he was supposed to call back. Her last name was Kunz. When he called her and left her a message, and being the gentleman he was taught to be, he addressed her as "Ms". And being the goofball who cannot pronounce Smith, added a "T" to her name. Between the "n" and the "z". And did not make the "u" long. In the background of that message she will hear me "BWAAAHAA" like Mr. Ed. I am thinking he won't get THAT lady's floor job.

God, I love that man.

Okay, sue me. I only did nine. If you want to do this because you can't think of a post, let me know in your comment. I will assign you a letter. Hee! I feel so teacher-y.

BTW, I used 16 sets of quotation marks in this "R" post. Seventeen. It has to be a record. Eighteen. I just titled this thing. heh heh. I need more sleep. I am thinking I am flipping hilarious at this point.

41 comments:

Debbie said...

I though I had used up all the available quotation marks in my post yesterday. I'm glad you were able to find some to use. You should have stuck the Reeses in there. That is the only possible change I could suggest. And your love for your hubby is so inspiring.

J'Ollie Primitives said...

Wondering what Rick would do with an old classmates' name. FUCHS.

I think she changed her name to Smith the minute she turned 18.

Deb said...

ya done good, ms. jill. i think with all your brainstorming, we can say you got all 10... although the whole roombah thing was a tiny bit weak. can you love it when you don't even have one? how closely have you observed your sil's?

Debz said...

I'm with the other Deb. You can't truly say you love something never having had said thing. Ooo, I sounded almost lawyerly there.
But good list since you were drunk er, tired. Yeah, yeah, we'll go with tired.
:) Talk to you later - when you wake up...

Ronda's Rants said...

Cute and Ronda ...you love Ronda!

Ronda's Rants said...

Oh...and the sex thing I totally agree...I have been with Hubby a very long time..how can it possibly still get better and better...No one tells you these things...that it will still be wonderful at 50!

Rhonda said...

And don't forget this Rhonda with an h! lol

I'm totally with you on the "rock" one. Absolutely!

And I do the gesture thing too. But not necessarily to people sitting on my couch. It's more when they are on the computer or someone driving down the road who should never have gotten a license. And chances are our gestures are a little different.

Don't forget to come back and see my Holding Fast post.

Kristen said...

I can totaly relate to your ROCK.
I too hear a old favorite and think I'm 16 again...even though I look like a crazy old lady jammin' to Queen
We are the champions...sorry I had a flashback!

Tiffany said...

What is this sweet rice you speak of? I must know.

I'm tired today so I can't think of anything funny to say. Fuck! Oh sorry I forgot where I was.

Ash said...

Oh Rock! Hair Rock to be precise.

Poison. "Every Rose has its Thorn." Makes me weepy every stinkin' time.

Dee said...

This was a great list of "9". I think your #9 was the best.

@nnie said...

came to you from Dawn's Diversions. Quite a cool blog you've got goin' here! I just did the letter P today, so it was fun to read your R list.

Annie said...

Darn! I got R from Amy. Looks like I will reassign myself.I thought R was hard!

Michelle said...

I agree with the Rock. I totally get taken back with a song. Great job on finding things that start with R. It's kind of tricky. :)

Swirl Girl said...

Right On!!!!

Jane! said...

I totally hear you on the 'racing' thing. What is up with that, anyway?
Notice I only used single quotes because I couldn't FIND any more doubles.

nikkicrumpet said...

You are flippin hilarious. Sleep or no sleep you're just funny! Ya did good with the "r" now assign somebody the "x" because I just have to read that post lol

amelia bedelia said...

tiff is cracking me up...she didn't know about the bread starter and NOW she doesn't even know what sweet rice is....good gosh, tiff, you need to quit hangin with them skunks! This made me laugh out loud!

nonna said...

i think, even if you have to make yourself get up in the middle of the night, you should blog on 3 hours of sleep all the time! very funny list, especially towards the end when you "ran out" of ideas. lol

Mrs Anne said...

adoRable!

Love this!

Jill said...

love the relations part and reclining I love to recline except it's never done in peace in my house with the kids needing something from me every two seconds!

Unknown said...

Loved your list of Rs but I have to agree that the Roombah doesn't count cause you don't have it. You just want it. I'm just saying...

But loved that your sweetheart's name starts with an R so you did a really nice "tribute" to him.

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

It is harder than it seems...huh.

So you should have done Rhumba....you know the dance instead of Roombah LOL

You did a great job, but you get a -2. You don't have a Roombah and you only did 9. Such a Rebel!

Rick is such a nice guy even if he did call Ms. Kunz...Ms. Kuntz. Oops

Alpacamountain said...

LMAO at Tiffany!
I have a roomba. I think I have ocd. They are great, but for the love of all that is holy...don't stand there and watch the damn thing. It.will.drive.you.nuts. Why are you not coming to visit me? huh? Do I smell?

Jenni said...

You can never have too many quotation marks or ellipsis, I say! I think relations and rock go together (at least according to the movie Footloose).

Anonymous said...

You totally are meant to have the letter R! Fabu-luss. And, I like your ghetto button. It's snazzy.

Candid Carrie said...

Did your husband call Mike Hunt? Oh yeah, say it again baby! You know you want to ...

Anonymous said...

I'd love to do it, but you'd give me X Y or Z. And thanks for driving to Utah to get that card postmarked. You really had me confused doing it that way!!

Kritta22 said...

I thought I was the only one that said the word relations!! :) I love it!!

What about racy comments?

Paul Eilers said...

Back away from the computer... and go to bed.

Wendall K said...

OMG, I can totally hear it now. I would have been rolling. Rick and I might be related, you think?

Julie D said...

Did I not get a letter? Damn, what did I do to piss Deb off?

Anonymous said...

OK got for it, assign me a letter. I'm relatively new to your blog, but you seriously make me laugh. I need to come over more often because I need to laugh for...hey, my doctor even said so! *lol*

So therefor, you MUST go on the blogroll!

Good job on the R's!

Paige said...

Sure, assign me a letter. I have been pretty boring lately, I need inspiration

We have a roomba. The dogs got over it after a few times,but the pig is totally tripped out over it. He thinks it is getting his food. and it is

Vodka Mom said...

you rock
you roll

:-)

Justine said...

Hey, gimme a letter! Gimme a letter! I've got blog fart! No way I could make mine as entertaining as this, but I'll try.
Ricola's are actually very delicious.
Relations: You're a ho bag.
Rick on the phone: Priceless

Justine :o )

Deb said...

I want a letter please!!

Unknown said...

So not fair that you got the letter that your Man's name starts with. Cheater.

binks said...

I totally had a super funny and snarky comment and my damn phone ate it all up. Schnikes!! Damn technology.
Now all I can think about is that stupid rice with milk and sugar and butter. I eat that and my hubby thinks I am insane. Nice to know that I am not.

Betty said...

I´m coming to your blog from "Life is good". She says you give away letters to post about.
I would love to get one also. Need some blog fodder....

Tana said...

This was funny to read. R sounds easy until you start making a list and realize all the r things that you are forgeting and what if you hurt their feelings. Ramen noodles is crying in a bowl somewhere.