Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My Nickname

Alrighty O-
Just want to thank you millions of fans for following me and supporting me as I did my first Guest Appearance on Deb's blog.
I got 313 comments!!! (pelvic thrusts towards Dooce)
Okay, only about 40 of those were LEGITIMATE ones, but 313 just the same. There was some taunting, Top Commenter battling, and our own version of Twittering going on there, but the whole idea that Deb would return back to her Hotel and find 313 comments to ME on HER blog made me wet myself. Really. We sort of blew up the site and switched to Twitter and that's where the converstion ended. Only because "Mean ol Deb" found where we were hiding and sent us all to our rooms. So if you have any extra time and nothing to do, I invite you go and read the comments and unravel the mystery of why I had to go change clothes midway through.

We have planned, unbeknowst to Deb, that we are meeting again same place at 8pm tonight. Click here to join us. I promise lots of fun and downright dirty with mud, blood. boobs, and lots of cussing clean competition. Tiffany will be leading the pack of wolves us tonight. Fun for all!

I actually have a post today, and now that I am done advertising, I will get the show on the road!

Today, class I want to discuss NICKNAMES. Say it with me. NICKNAMES.

Now, some nicknames are specific to you and others, more vaguely generalized. The vague ones, such as "Boy", "Girl", "What's Your Face", and "Hey You" are mainly used when speaking in general to some one. Such as, "Hey, Boy, how much for the doggie in the window?" Or, "Girl, that dress is divine." We add more personalized meaning to nicknames like "Sweetie", "Honey", "Sugar Pie", or "Snookems" to show fondness. We say names like "Bozo", "Nimrod", "Douche Bag", and "Ass Hat" to show our scorn.

A nickname that sticks, such as "T.O.", "Boss Hog", "Princess", and "Big Mama" are given in adoration and is defined by our attitude, our job, or even the postion we hold.

Except for me.

I always wanted a cool "defining" nickname. Having a nickname meant I belonged to someone and that person calling me the nickname thought I was speacial enough to have one chosen. I was called corny names by my dad and grandparents like "Jilly Bean", "Jilljillbobill", "Jilldee" and sometimes even "Jillzee", but those, even though said in love, never were real nicknames. Was there a name that someone would call me that I never tired of?

NOPE. I got stuck with "JILLDO" by the same guy whom I had a major crush on, but then threw up on on the mountain in high school.

And there was "EAT". Now, remember I was fatty when I was young. Jr. high and high school, I was thin and hotttt. The nickname "Eat" was given to me by my crush's best friend. I was horrified. OHMYGODHETHINKSI'MFAT!!!!!!!!! OMGHE THINKSIEATWEIRD!!!!!! OMGWHATTHEF***DOES'EAT'MEAN?!?

Finally, after months of being called "Eat", "Spanky"(yep.HIS gaywad nickname) tells me why after all this time he and all his extremely much cooler friends call me "Eat".

"Do you remember when we went skiing?" He asked.
"Yes"
"Do you remember that I was feeling sick all the way there?"
"uh huh"
"And we stopped on the side of the dark road to let Randy pee?"
"Yeah"
"And you got out backward with your ass first and I was poring out my beer coke and it splashed on your legs and without even turning around you mule-kicked the shit out of me which sent me flying through the air because you thought I was throwing up on you?"
*blink*blink*
"You are 'Eat'. Eat up with the dumb ass."
"oooooh"

So whatever nickname you have been dubbed with and hate, it HAS to be better than the 2 I am still known by to my high school friends.

So quit 'cher cryin'!

Jilldo or Eat

34 comments:

Anonymous said...

My brother's nickname in high school was Booger so I was dubbed Lil' boog by all his friends. But I think Jilldo is the best...haha!

Unknown said...

LMFAO so thats what all the twitter was about last night...the whole 8pm bit...NO ONE told me and I was there! pfffftttt I will expect the sameloyality tomorrow when i talk about apperations

Beth and Janice said...

Ah, nicknames, they are fun, aren't they? Well, I was a very overweight, awkward, gawky 13 year old w/ braces and glasses who got dubbed, by her bro's older friends "Jabba the Hut" then shortened to "Baby Jabba". That one was GREAT for the pre-pubescent self esteem. It's amazing, that, to this day, I actually DO like the Star Wars movies and can watch without sobbing!

Unknown said...

Oh yes this IS YOUR blog...nicknames well ummm my REAl nme is G-E-O-R-G-I-N-A and growing up no one could pronouce it...oh hell even now NO one can pronouce it...I am Gina to my family....George to my X co-workers and georgie to my friends...I was georgie porgie puddin pie yadda yadda yadda I was spider legs-yep i was tall back then...now i am just me....

I so LOVE the nickname JILLY! it reminds me of one of my favorite movies (blatent hint coming up) PRACTICAL MAGIC-soooo um if you wanna get me a gift for my b-day i want that movie on DVD....along with insane mamas tote bag.....just throwin it out there....oh and I so know your getting older on the 24th dont think i forgot...

the beans are excited your comin to town it is like a concert....JILL JILL BO BILL is comin to town! the boys wont be there...it is huntin season and middle bean was drawn in on a hunt sooooo...it's just me and the girl beans...ok ok i am doin a post in your comment section...sowwy!

Kritta22 said...

I agree with Georgie--I like Jilly! It's like you are our twin sister!
8pm what time zone? Don't you remember this white chick doesn't go by the same time. If I log in at 8 my time and you guys aren't there, I'm calling you Jilldo forever!

Unknown said...

LMAO@ kritta calling you JILLDO forever!

OH Kritta thats sooo funny...oh and for you early birds i have a SPECIAL blog post being posted automatically at 4:13 am Wednesday...why 4:13am you ask? because thats how I roll.....

JILLY where are you????

Unknown said...

yes I am PIMPIN out my blog on Jills comment section...yet again soooo how I roll

Insane Mama said...

That was hilarious last night... I got a twitter message from Amelia to join you guys I can't believe you didn't crash the whole thing

Scary Mommy said...

And we can say we knew you when! 313 is insane. Off to see what it was all about. ;)

JillDo, that's a doozy. So glad I never got dubbed that one!

Anonymous said...

JillDo!!! Sweet Mother that is funny.

If the Sweet Mother comment didn't clue people that may know me in to realizing who I am then my nickname will.

I was the child of an older couple who apparently didn't realize they could call me Becky, Beth, Lizzy (brother called me "Thin Lizzy" growing up), Liza, Ellie - Geeesus my list goes on.

When I would go to my friend's houses and get introduced I would always be met with "Ohhhhh! I had a Betsy Wetsy doll growing up!!"

Seriously??? How many epidurals did my mom have in the hospital?

However I do have to admit that JillDo makes me chuckle - OK I am laughing with tears in my eyes. :)

Unknown said...

FYI ....I went to bed....then realized you still are NOT following me! pfffft i say! okay back to bed....how hard is it to click me then input my info??? I feel left out....

Tiffany said...

Hey Jilldo can I call you Big Momma? OK thanks! And I was called Fats by my family. Gee wonder why I am self conscience? Maybe cuz you called a fat kid FATS!!!!!!!!

Hubby calls me Skeeter. I have no idea why. Maybe I bother the piss out of him like a mosquito. Either that or I suck the life out of him. LOL

amelia bedelia said...

or the most famous one "betty crocker"! yes, because i have freckles, some mean guy called me that because I looked like a cherry chip cake.

amelia bedelia said...

oh, and night jill, my phone ran out of battery.

Mamahut said...

Crap I missed all of the fun...as usual. I love your blog and I loved you over at 3d too. Don't tell 3d I said that, she'll be all butt hurt:)

Thanks for stopping by my blog and telling me such nice things. It all helps the lady that is going to lose it soon!

Really? 8 kids? Really? Jilldo is the wrong nick-name. Sooo very wrong!

Swirl Girl said...

So nicknames, huh?

Hot and Juicy (guess what my real name is? and it's not burger)

Hubby calls me Wahltah...on account of when we were expecting our first kid and thinking of names - he said "what about Walter if it's a boy?" I, being the proper Bostonian - said in my best accent -" Wahltah? Not Wahltah!"

We also call each other Dude, Doody, and Duty depending on why when, why and how we are using the term.

Julie D said...

Oh, I'm so going to be stuck on Jilldo now.

I've never had any good nicknames. Jules is about it.

My life is all glamour, isn't it?

Annie said...

I love the Twitter-gate you have going, Jilldo. I guess it is better than Big Jilldo. Or Giant Jilldo. Just a nice, average Jilldo for the pretty lady.

Unknown said...

Yikes! I can't imagine being called Jilldo, especially in front of your parents (of course back then, they may not have known what one really was, right?)

The nicknames that stuck for me were "The Twins" being that I'm a twin and we weren't treated as individuals, and Neecy, Cimonnan, Lil Lee and now I'm "Boo" or "Boo Boo".

Twitter?? Am I missing all the fun?

Anonymous said...

Get off Twitter. It's all about Plurk.

Oct 11th for the next outing?

And, I was Vinny for a long time. And, Ho quite a bit.

That Janie Girl said...

Jilldo.

Oh, my God.

You should SO not have told me that.

I'm going to erase that from the already clean slate that serves as my mind.

You're lucky, though, nothing sticks.

See ya, Jilldo.

Debz said...

well believe it or not, mine used to be "hersheys kisses". given to me by an uncle (who was a truck driver) as my CB handle. i hated that name.

of course now YOU call me 3D and that's just a blatant lie. so whatever...

Unknown said...

JILLy debs blog wont let me leave comments on the i see dead people post! LOL did she block me???

i am off to the doctor with daddy be home later today...and OMGosh plurk??? I gotta learn another one geesh i will never keep up

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