Friday, August 1, 2008

Setting the Record Straight

I drive 8 long hours with 4 of my kids and 3 grand kids in two cars, stopping at every town for a pee break or drinks to fuel the next pee break, listening to arguing and loud music and crying, wishing I had rocks to chew on or sharp sticks to poke in my eyes...

...when I drive into Amarillo, and receive a call from Amelia. Funny, funny Amelia. She informs me to read her blog, to which I respond, I can't because Mom's computer is in the shop and mine has been locked in the hot trunk for 8 hours and would have to charge because it's a POS.

That's when she springs the news:
Her: "I blogged about the football game incident."
Me: "Which one?"
Her: "Dr. A"
Me: "You did not."
Her: "Uh huh."
Me: "You die."
Her: "K, bye, love you."
Me: "Love you, too.

So, when we pull into mom's driveway, everyone bails out and hugs and kisses and oohs and awws over the babies and I shout over my shoulder as I race into the house with my computer, "Hey, Mom, Love you. Amy blogged about the football game incident. Have to go do damage control." To which mom says, "Which football game incident?"


Okay, I just need to set the record straight:

I said "HYMEN" not "clitoris".

And That's a BIG difference!!!

And that WAS one of my most embarrassing moments, and I was happy to share that embarrassment with my entire family and friends!

It's taken me 27 years to live it down...

And I never DID get my hymen, I mean frenham, cut. The hymen, well, that was taken care of, but not by my dentist...

Stay tuned, I am digging up some dirt...

8 comments:

Ronda's Rants said...

Oh my God...you are too funny! I think I might have to start bringing our dirt on my poor sisters!

Shelley said...

I so get the sticks to poke in my eyes....LOL. You are hilarious.

cIII said...

Hymen...Clitorus.........
Tomato....Tomoto.....
Have a great weekend.

Kritta22 said...

Well that IS a big difference! (Same general area though)
I'm sorry...I'm still laughing! you better dig up some good dirty. Get her old journal if you have to!

Deb said...

sorry jill but that was a fan-freakin-tastic story. she got ya good with that one.

i will definitely accept the invite into the yaya sisterhood. thanks!

Tenakim said...

I will defend you- hymen is much different: a more understandable mix up and not nearly as humiliating as clitoris- especially considering you lifting your lip at the time! Hymen- that's not so bad!

amelia bedelia said...

yeah, yeah, sister.....try to make yourself look better. It's ok. Jesus knows the truth.

Zo-Be Designs said...

I needed a laugh and I got a huge one! Thanks for sharing, can't wait to read more.