Wednesday, August 20, 2008

THE talk

Alright, I sat down to have THE talk with Cooper, my 12 yr old, while he was watching TV. I had been rehearsing in my head how I would approach this and I was really nervous, not ever talking with my boys about this. I had handled the girls, and their father had talked with the boys.

It went a little somethin' like this:

Me: "Hey, Coop, I really wanted to talk to you about something."
Him: "Okay. Am I gettin' in trouble?"
Me: "No. I just wanted to talk to you."
Him: "Okay. " (turns towards the TV)
Me: "I want to talk about sex."
Him: "Hmm?!?" (high-pitched and now focused on me)
Me: 'You know, when a man and a woman are in love and they show their love to each-"
Him: (holding up his hand) "Mom, really. You probably should be having this talk with Claire. She's the one with the boyfriend."
Me: "Yes, oh-wise-one, but I need to explain to YOU exactly what sex is."
Him: (still holding up his hand) "Mom. Dad's weekend is next weekend. I would probably learn more from him."
Me: "Yeah, okay. You're probably right."

Gee, that was easier than I thought!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And in response to my beloved sister, Amelia:

Remember the time I came into my room and you had drawn all over my Donny Osmond album cover with a pen that didn't work, so it wasn't obvious that you had scribbled on it until I was listening to the record and singing to his gorgeous face on the cover when suddenly the light hit it just right and I saw? Yeah, me either...

Be afraid...be very afraid....

17 comments:

Swirl Girl said...

oooh, let me know how it goes.
I am so afraid of even beginning this conversation with my daughter - who is only eight, but starting to get curious, and blushing, and 'likes, likes' this boy ,and....

Deb said...

Good talk! Wish they could all be that easy!

amelia bedelia said...

It was Erin!!!!!! who drew all over Donny!!!

GinGin said...

CHICKEN!!!
Hey, did you ever get my reply to the Canton trip. I say yes, yes, yes. TB had an offer on house, so her d-i-v-o-r-c-e will be coming along pretty soon, and I told her to fly down here in November for Canton and maybe Amelia B can too. We would have so much fun!!!!!!!!!!!
Now, we still need to meet sometime. My feelings are really hurt that you have met some other blogging friends before we could get together. HAHA I'm going to give you a call soon, but it's kind of hectic getting all this school stuff ready. Hope to see you soon.

mommaof4wife2r said...

i love ur talk...and i love kids! i have 4 girls, my #1 is mortified with boys thinking about sex all the time and calling girls 'hot'. i am lol thinking about u talking to ur son.

as for the album cover...i didn't have a sister, but a brother. and i totally feel for you. i'm sorry for your loss. :)

Ronda's Rants said...

You may be surprised that for about 10 years ...I have taught God's Gift of Sexuality to Junior and Senior High School kids at our church...including my own. Dad did not and has not talked to our boys...it was me.
Just like Nike said...Just do it!
The talk...not sex...gosh Jill where is your head? :)

Shelley said...

Yeah, we figured we would talk to our sons together last year. One was in 5th grade and one was entering middle school and we didn't want him to hear it from his friends, so we just laid it all out there for him. He looked at us funny and said, thanks for sharing that.

NucMEd is Hot said...

I have grils and I still don't want to have the talk. Congratulations on avoiding it!

Deb said...

alls i know is it wasn't me who drew on donny.

and your talk went only slightly better than my leaving the condom on the tv talk - hope it doesn't have the same ending (lol).

Sidney said...

I had that talk with my now-17 year old daughter when she was 9 and I was pregnant. She could do math well, also, as she could figure out that there was only *6* months between our marriage and her birth....THAT was fun.....


I wanna go to Canton!!

georgie said...

Phew that wwas easy! You should have seen me explaining to my girl beans how to use a tampon-yiyiyi

iMommy said...

LOL, this is hilarious :-)

Thanks for sharing! I can only hope my talks go as well...

I can't remember my mother talking to me, except to say "You'll be pregnant before your next birthday if you keep that up!" every time I kissed a boy.

LOL.

Mom Taxi Julie said...

Too funny iMommy.

I remember my mom giving me "the talk". I've spared my oldest. In this day and age I think they can look up anything they want to know lol.

Scary Mommy said...

I'm dreading "the" talks, but that wasn't so bad. Great job. :)

Ronda's Rants said...

The book is called God's Gift of Sexuality...I think it is a Presbyterian Study Course...but I am not sure!I will find out and see if I can give you a copy.

Kritta22 said...

Very nice job with the TALK! Way to go! And I would definately be scared Amy, you don't mess with a girls Donnie!

Elaine A. said...

Yeah, I am TOTALLY making my husband handle this one since we have boys. Although I should probably worry about what he'll say...

I know he will definitely be passing out condoms, that's for sure.